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She looked at me in triumph and I cracked, sarcastically telling her to take pity on me and suck my erection, something she had flatly refused to do since we started courting. She turned on her heals and, looking back, she said she would bet I would love to get excited while watching her with another mans penis in her in her mouth, blushing crimson when I grinned and nodded furiously in assent. We did not speak to each other all night or next morning at breakfast.Now I knew things were getting out of hand and it had been my fault so it was up to me to make moves to put it right. I left work early and prepared a meal with a nicely chilled bottle of wine and was rewarded with a peck on the cheek and a broad smile. Things were relaxed as the meal ended and after a grovelling apology I risked diving in to explain my reasons for writing to the couple. I reminded her that she was a very shapely woman and would look good posing in sexy undies or even less and I had just thought that it. . I'll go on. Anyhow, I started arguing with my Bible-study leader and I loved to embarrass her, 'cause I actually knew a lot more about the Bible than she did. Whenever she got a fact wrong I'd correct her and I could talk about ancient Hebrew and Greek society, which she didn't know a thing about. Finally one day after we were done and everyone had left, she told me that she wanted to talk to me. She told me: 'you know what? You may know what's written in the Bible, but for you it's not the Living Word; to you it's dead. You're so arrogant that you don't understand what the Living Word is. You have raised yourself up with your sinful conceit, you don't know humility before the Lord, and you don't have Jesus in your heart. I don't know what's inside your heart, but I can tell you it isn't Jesus.' The only reason I didn't say anything was because I didn't want it getting back to my mom, but she was right, and I was glad about it. I didn't have Jesus in my heart. I knew that I was free.
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